What Can I Do? The Question That Changes Everything

How We Approach Relationships

Most of us approach our relationships with horses the same way we approach our relationships with people. Here is what I mean.

When things go well, we focus on ourselves.

• "Your horse did amazing today.”
• “Yes, I have been working with him. My idea really paid off.”

When things do not go well, we focus on the other party.

• “This horse will not cross water. I do not know what is wrong with him.”

Every time something goes wrong, our brain pushes us to zero in on their problem, not ours.

Why We Default to Blame

This is not because we are terrible people. It is normal. Our brains are wired to protect us.

Your natural brain does two things really well:

1. Avoids pain and discomfort
2. Conserves energy

If the problem is someone else’s fault, you do not have to change anything. That saves energy and avoids the discomfort of admitting mistakes.

Here is the catch. As long as we are looking outward at the horse, the boss, the spouse, or the circumstance, we are stuck. Nothing changes. No progress is made.

The Secret to Getting Unstuck

Life is complicated. Personal responsibility is a huge topic. You could spend years reading books on it.

Horses taught me to keep things simple. They do not speak English. You have to break everything down into the simplest steps if you want them to understand.

Here is the way forward when you feel powerless. The secret to getting unstuck when things are not going your way.

It is four words.

"What Can I Do?"

How to Use “What Can I Do?”

Every time you want to blame, complain, or give up, shift your focus by asking this one question.

• Your horse breaks the rope every time you grab the fly spray. What can I do
• Your horse bolts at water. What can I do
• Your boss says, I need you on time to work. What can I do
• You get called in about a road rage incident. What can I do
• You have told her a thousand times and she still does not listen. What can I do

This simple shift puts your power back in your hands. It keeps you moving forward. It gets you unstuck.

The Habit That Changes Your Life

Do not dismiss this because it sounds simple. Simplicity is what makes it powerful. If you build the habit of asking What can I do in the heat of the moment, you will change how you respond to challenges in every part of your life.

Instead of waiting for someone else to change, you step into action. Instead of staying frustrated, you take ownership. Instead of being powerless, you are powerful.

Improve your life by practicing four words. What Can I Do

Take the Next Step

At Stable Living Coaching, we go deep into tools like this and how to apply them in everyday life. You do not have to stay stuck. You can move forward with clarity, confidence, and strength.

Sign Up for a 14 day free trial and see if coaching is right for you at stablelivingcoaching.com

And remember, You Cannot Fail if You Do Not Ever Stop Chasin’ It!