How to Improve Communication by First Understanding Others
Meet Wimpy: The Royal Quarter Horse
Welcome to this week's You Are Destined For Greatness, coming to you today with my little three-year-old gelding, Wimpy. Now, Wimpy is not wimpy. Wimpy is actually a royal name. Wimpy was the name of the first registered Quarter Horse, so my friend Wimpy here is named after royalty.
The Heart of Effective Communication
Anyway, my message to you today—I wanted to continue on with our series on communication, so I'll talk a little bit more about that. Last week, here's a quick recap. What we talked about was is, the takeaway was not to assume automatically that because you relay something, it's understood. We also talked about the meaning of communication—that it is understanding, not just the transmission of words or other information. It's not just transferring information. It's actually mutual understanding. In other words, I understand you, and you understand me. That's when communication takes place.
Understand to Be Understood
So today, the takeaway is this: there's a lot that goes into communication, okay? It is probably the most important skill that we can endeavor to master in our lifetimes. So today's little piece—the little tip—is this: the tip is to know that the better I understand who I want to understand me, the better I will be understood. Okay, that's the message.
Using Horses to Understand Human Connection
This horse is my example. Right now, he's probably not understanding my words, okay? I don't expect him to. But I know horses well enough because of my experience, my study, and my observation of what's going on with him right now and always, that I can clearly communicate with him pretty well. Now, if you're not familiar with horses, not so much, right? You might think, "Well, how do I get him to do what I want him to do if you don't understand?" This is my example.
So let's just say, What does that look like? Because if you're talking about your own kids or your own close relationships, you kind of feel like you already know them, right?
Why Observation Is the Foundation of Communication
What I'm talking about in today's takeaway is this: whether it's somebody close, somebody you don't know so well, or even another species, what I'm suggesting is that, first of all, you become aware that the better you understand them, the more you'll be able to be understood. And you just take time to observe.
Like if I want to communicate with you, first of all, I take a moment to see where I can guess that you're at emotionally. Do you have time to talk to me? Does it look like everything's okay? How well do I know you? And take all of that into consideration before I start my communication. Because what will happen is, when I'm taking you into consideration, I'll automatically be able to relay and convey to you in all the ways that I communicate in a better way for you to be able to understand me.
Final Thoughts
That's the takeaway today. Remember, thank you for being with us, and don't ever forget that You Are Destined For Greatness.
